YEEEEHAWWWW!!!!!Got me a ride in a PICK-UP!!!

[Prince Valiant]

That's right...the inner redneck in me was living large last night :goof

Josh stop by in the syclone to head down to hwy 100...this is a ride that I had been hoping to hook-up for sometime, but our paths never did cross at just the right time...If I could go, the truck couldn't...or his GF was taking up the passenger seat...or I was out of town, etc...

BUT, last night both the schedules were empty and so it was a go.

Now, josh pulled up and I hoped in and the inner redneck didn't know WHAT the he11 was up...

"Hey Josh", I drawled. " sumbuddy done left 'der 'puter in yer pick-me-up truck...bet you could pawn it fer a shotgun rack, cuz I'z notice, U ain't got none."

Josh fortunately quickly pointed out my error in my faulty logic and showed me what in fact was up...now I don't want to give too much away, but that laptop showed everything. I bet he could even tell you if his girlfriend was ovulating or not from that computer if she just simply sat in the truck :goof

So anyways, I'm having a grand time just following the various gauges and asking a million questions a minute...you know, just to seem smart. Mostly I just repeated what Josh had just said. Try it sometimes, I'm sure the boss would be impressed. Example:

ME: "So what's this telling me?"
Josh: "Oh, that's just the intake temperature gauge"
ME: " OH, so it tells you the temperature of the air flowing through the intake manifold?"
Josh: "Yeah...Man Chris, you're smart!"

Okay...that's the basics, but if you're good you can make it alot more seamless. AND I might point out, that conversation really did happen. (author's note: italics in this paragraph indicate that it really didn't happen)

So as we pull up to hwy 100 and agreed that we are going to oscars, josh throws me for a loop. Instead of pulling on the south bound ramp, he exits north bound....

"Josh, Do you even know where Oscar's is?!?"

To which Josh replied "Oh yeah...I just like to pull a U-ie up here and get on it a bit to record how she's running with the computer"

"oh....makes sense to me"

So here it is...my first go in the syclone. Now, this wasn't as exciting as the first time I got laid, or even the second. Or even the time as I almost got laid a third time... (granted...this was my first attempt at a three-fer-one, IE 3 in one night, but I digress) but I had to admit, I didn't know what to expect as I've haven't ridden in an AWD vehicle that was puported to be as fast as this. He turns it around, guns and and....eh?

cont'd

[Prince Valiant]

It clearly was having issues...now that wasn't quite so obvious to me, but it made sense. The reason it wasn't obvious was there was simply a shake on acceleration. Nothing too terribly dramatic, and the first time having riden in this thing, didn't seem too outlandish to me. Of course, Josh who knows it like the back of his hand could tell and immediately was off the throttle.

SO we did a couple more recorded runs...seeing what the CPU was recording, and sure enough, it looked horrible. One run the total advance was retarded enough to qualify for a ride in the short bus to be taken to play with Pork at the adult day-care facility.

So what's up with it? Well, Josh's car must most definitely be female and here's why: You know how sometimes you come home and the little lady is just pissed off at you? You don't know why, she just is. You ask what's wrong and you get the "Nothing" response...which even I know that means something is up.

SO, after begging and pleading to find out what's wrong, you just press a couple buttons (foot rubs, shoulder rubs, tell her she can be on top...) then she brightens up. And that's exactly what Josh's truck did...

Truth be told, he pushed a couple of wires, moved them around a little and that seemed to be the ticket as one wire "didn't look quite right...a little close to the down pipe". Josh wasn't too sure what he did actually fixed it, so he agreed that the next time the problem comes up he's just going to do a raindance next to the truck and see if that cures the problem...

Whatever the case the truck was running great now...now's time to crank the boost and see what she's got.

So we went to a desolate road, wholely in our imagination so the cops can't get there, and came to a stop. Josh foot-brakes the car and starts building the revs...now the first thing that struck me was the amount of time it took to build the revs and conversely, the boost...this would be important later on...but once up to ~3000 he let his foot off and now it's time to find out what the syclone was all about.

Let me tell you in one word: "Ohmygodthatwascool"

The nose shoots hard into the air and there is a wierd noise that accompanies the acceleration...what's this? Yep, all four wheels (or at least one front, one back) were actually spinning. Instead of the typical RWD response of the back end getting hairy this car seemed to "crab" or get sideways while going completely straight in the direction of the road....and then when the boost REALLY came on and the wheels stopped spinning (about 2 seconds) the thing was like a rocket sled. An electric Rocket sled.

See, the thing is is that the turbo and the exhaust work very very well to keep this thing very quiet...so much so that it makes for a serene ride. Coupled with the relatively low drama of the auto and AWD it's hard to gauge how fast you're actually accelerating.

cont'd

[Prince Valiant]

Make no doubt about it...the G forces sink you in the seat better than 99% of you may have ever felt in your life. But the other things, the noise, the fighting to control the vehicle, the things that ADD to the "sense" of speed aren't there...

Now one look at the world around you will correct your senses quickly...and even then a look at the speedo will shock you still when you realize HOW fast you're going, and conversely HOW QUICKLY you got there. This thing is FAST.
So we cruised some on the hwy...just seeing what's out. Of course, I looked extra slick with the laptop, looking as if I was tuning on the fly, lol :goof

As we were talking though we noticed not one, but TWO Subie's STi's on the hwy. Josh mentions that "yeah...I've always wanted to race on of those things. Never had the chance."

I had to look at him with that wide-eyed "well-here's-your-chance" look to get him to go pacing these guys down. And we're off.

We catch one of the guys at a light that was just about to turn to green and josh stated "Not enought time to build the boost..." and sure enough, try as he might, He got outlaunched badly. The subie took off hardcore, more than I expected from it and he pulled three cars on josh's truck.

But just as the syclone started to hit second (rather quickly in this car with a yellow line at 5Krpm) we rocketed past the subie like it was standing still.

"Was that thing even still on it?"

I thought it was, josh wasn't so sure...only way to find out was to try and race the guy agian.

Well, it took forever to get next to him again...and when we were, Josh didn't think he was going to race

"Yeah he is Josh..."
"I don't know chris..."
"Trust me dude, he's racing. Get ready...."
"I don't thi...." With that the light turned green and sure enough, the bike and subie took-off in full race mode.

"Well, that settles that, eh Josh?"

cont'd

[Prince Valiant]

FINALLY we get next to the guy again...with the same R600 as before occupying the middle lane, and this time, Josh is ready. He rev's, apply's the brakes, and brings the rpms up against the TC. You could hear the bike bringing his revs up as well as the disticnt sound of the flat four getting ready for a hardcore launch. Everyone is ready....

GREEN!

Both the subie and syclonne spin and we both get a good one car jump on the bike...my first impression was that this subie may be a little more than what would call "modified" because in the first second of the race, it didn't readily appear that we would handle him too easily...but just as I looked over that subie started to get small...really really quick. It wasn't too close at all, and from the looks of it it seems that I was right. He was on it when we blew past him :wooo

The bike on the other hand is starting to come up on us slowly...and with his front wheel about 2 feet off the ground too. It wasn't until about 80 or so did he convincingly pull away. The kid was certianly a good rider, that's for sure...I don't think most riders on the hwy possess the skill to lauch a short bike like that and that hard without the bike getting away from him...we talked to him later. Cool kid.

So that was it...My first ride in the syclonne, and it was very bad-a$$. When I got home I check the back of my neck to see if it was any redder...and it wasn't. Although I did notice hair growing on my back though :(

But a great truck and a good time. Thanks Josh! :rockwoot:

THE END :goof

[BAD LS1]

BWHAHHAHAH your stories carry alot of what the french would call detail :burnout

Always very entertaining to read your version over the normal " it goes ok" theme. :goof

[Crawlin]

i'm with Tommy on the "detail" portion :)

[Brian98GTP]

Yep.. great detail..!!!

Ive ridden with him in his old setup, and even THAT made the laptop smack you in the face when he launched it.... :3gears:

That truck actually got me sick though... We were trying to tune in the alky injection that day, and we must have launched that truck over a dozen times.... I felt sick to my stomach driving home afterwards...LMAO!! :puke
There's just something about having your internals thrown to the back of your body that doesnt feel so good... :) ... and that was his OLD setup...
I can just imagine what it feels like now... :thumbsup

[deciuss]

sweet story

[Yooformula]

Damm dude, that was ole skool Dennis style postin there :rolf

[ChevelleBabe88]

Dayum! i agree with Tom... Dude that is a major amount of detail!! LOL my favorite part was when u were describing the problem of the truck and compared it to a G/F or wife that was hilarious...especially the"you can be on top" part LOL niice :goof

[Pantera99GS]

Now THAT was well worth reading! :banana

[Syclone0044]

But a great truck and a good time. Thanks Josh! :rockwoot:
My pleasure, Chris!! :thumbsup

[Milw96Cobra]

Not knocking the syclone or anything, but, let me get this straight...

Truth be told, he pushed a couple of wires, moved them around a little and that seemed to be the ticket as one wire "didn't look quite right...a little close to the down pipe". Josh wasn't too sure what he did actually fixed it, so he agreed that the next time the problem comes up he's just going to do a raindance next to the truck and see if that cures the problem...


So he's not sure how he fixed it, but it was fixed?

Uhhh... that doesn't sound too reassuring to me. Clusterfvck is the word that comes to mind.

[Syclone0044]

The spark plug wire connector has a friction fit inside the silicone plug boot and on the #1 wire, it came slightly undone when I changed plugs 1 hour prior to giving Chris a ride. It was OK at first but must have come apart on the way to his house because it was causing a hell of a misfire at WOT once he got in. In the parking lot I pressed it back into place, as well as repositioning the #6 wire away from the downpipe. Nonetheless, I would never deny that Syclones & Typhoons are among the worst vehicles to work on & tune. :crazyeyes