Arigmaster
04-02-2007, 06:22 PM
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I
have never figured out why men think with their head, and women with
their heart. For example:
One evening lasts week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well
the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "What???!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear.....
"You're not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman, enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you
in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several
different, very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take,
so I told her we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a
pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jeweler department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you . . . . she was so excited. She must
have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she
was testing me, because she asked for a tennis bracelet, when she doesn't
even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I
think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
"What?"
I then said "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough
for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I
have never figured out why men think with their head, and women with
their heart. For example:
One evening lasts week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well
the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "What???!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear.....
"You're not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman, enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you
in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several
different, very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take,
so I told her we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a
pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jeweler department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you . . . . she was so excited. She must
have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she
was testing me, because she asked for a tennis bracelet, when she doesn't
even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I
think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
"What?"
I then said "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough
for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either